Might as well go for the fucking TSA trifecta baby!
Have you heard that the TSA will now stop screening old people thoroughly?
This is so wrong on so many levels I barely know where to start. First of all, they are going on the assumption that old people are all kind and friendly like. Have you ever met someone over 75 years old? I mean seriously, if you can stand the smell of old death and decaying flesh, then you should try and meet one. These people are more bat shit crazy and angry than any Allah loving terrorist will ever be! The stereotypical "GET OFF MY LAWN!!" comes from a deep well of anger and resentment these people have for their entire fucked-up, sheeple lives. If ANYONE is going to get pissed off on a plane it is one of these walking zombies!
Secondly, if you wanted to hide some lumpy, explosive material where the fuck better place to hide it then on some fucking old lumpy person? Have you seen what happens to women's tits when they get old? I mean you could pack enough C4 in the space taken up by an old broads saggy pancakes to take down a fleet of 747's. Do not even get me started with the ball sacks of old dudes either.
I do not think you could design a better place to hide things than an old person. Every inch is flabby, disgusting, bulging sacks of skin that could be used to hide anything. I am sure old people are constantly reaching into some pocket of decrepit skin and saying "Ahhh yeah, that's where I put my dentures."
Also have any of you seen the show Jackass? You remember when Johnny Knoxville dressed up as an old guy? How about Rob Dyrdek? You think terrorists have no access to disguises? Especially considering my point above they could make a gigantic old bomb terrorist easily. The TSA will just let them slip right through because old people are no threat to security. Are you fucking kidding me?
Keep coming up with these great ideas TSA, and Waffles will be there to show the world how stupid you really are.
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