Wednesday, May 4, 2011

The Waffles Report: No Photos of Osama: The Real Reason

Am I the only one who thinks Obama had Osama stored on ice, just waiting for the election season to start?

I mean, seriously. If you check out the news this morning Obama's in the toilet approval ratings jumped 9 freaking points! Just in time for re-election campaigning to start.

I cannot wait for photos or video to be released. I am going to examine the pictures closely for signs of freezer burn. Dumping him in the ocean was a brilliant way to get rid of any traces of existing decay. I bet they chummed the water before hand to make sure he got gobbled up by some sharks.

What the fuck is with these politicians too? I mean dozens of them are saying that because Obama killed Osama the US is going to be attacked. Um, hello? These are fucking terrorists! Of course, the US is going to be attacked! What the fuck did you think? That they gave up and started playing online poker instead? Should we have just let him go? "Oh Hai Osama! Yeah just skedaddle we do not want to start any terrorists attacks."

What fucking morons.

I guarantee that no photos are going to be released. I will have to scour the CIA dumpsters to find the real photos and bring you evidence that this whole thing was a campaign trick. Until then wave your American flags and shout "FUCK YA AMERICA!"

1 comment:

  1. Also, drive your four-wheeler around while screaming "USA", waving a flag and shooting a handgun up in the air.

    That's an ORDER soldier!